Partners Can't Agree on a Home? Here's What to Do

Partners Can't Agree on a Home? Here's What to Do

While homebuying is an amazing opportunity and an important step toward a more secure future for yourself and your family, we realize that looking for a new home can also be a stressful process, complete with any number of challenging ups and downs.

And one of the biggest, least-expected challenges of all may just come from within your family itself. What do you do when it comes time to settle on a home, and you and your partner can’t agree?  

It’s a conflict that we’ve all seen dramatized on countless episodes of House Hunters (“Tammy wants a rustic colonial near the beach, while Tom wants an ultra-modern penthouse close to his job in the middle of the city…”), but we never quite expect it to happen to us.

Buying a home is one of the most important decisions you can make as a family unit. Here are three things to keep in mind when you and your partner don’t quite see eye-to-eye on your “dream” property:

1.) There Are Other Fish in the Sea

No, no, we’re not advocating splitting up with your partner, we’re saying that you shouldn’t feel the need to rush into a sale, especially if the property is the source of some debate.

Chicago has a rich real estate marketplace with a wide variety of properties for every taste and budget, from striking modern condos in the South Loop to charming single family homes in North Center or Lincoln Square.

Passing on a home because of one partner’s nerves doesn’t mean you won’t find a home that’s better-suited to your needs. As REALTOR.com puts it, “don’t fall prey to the idea that there’s only one ‘dream home’ for you” – if one partner is hesitant, and your time and budget allow it, then don’t be afraid to continue your search.

2.) You Can’t Always Get What You Want

Pardon the dad rock reference, but do keep the Rolling Stones’ classic piece of advice in mind: It can be incredibly tough to find a home that checks off every single one of both partners’ boxes. In most cases, buyers will have to be willing to make some trade-offs and sacrifices in order to find a place that meets all of their needs (like the location, and number of bedrooms and bathrooms) while also providing many of their wants (including the right amenities, a yard, and unique design features).

3.) Meet Your Partner Halfway

Meet Sam and Cam. Cam has an eye on a charming “fixer-upper” right near public transportation, but Sam is hesitant to invest time and money into the property when there are other options available, albeit further away.

There’s no best way to solve this dilemma, but both partners could probably help sway the other by making some concessions. Maybe Cam could promise to oversee the bulk of the renovations and work with the contractors, so Sam can focus on other things; maybe Sam offers to look into parking options or ridesharing to make the distance more palatable to Cam.

In other words, both partners can get the home they’d prefer – if they reach out, communicate, and really listen to their partner and work to accommodate their needs.

You didn't know we were marriage counselors, did you? Being a good real estate agent calls on all sorts of skill sets!

Another easy way to help manage tensions during the homebuying process? Have a qualified real estate professional by your side! The Real Group team has seen it all, and we’re here and ready to help guide you through all of the ins and outs of buying and selling in Chicagoland. Why not take a look at some of our listings or drop us a line to get started?

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